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Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Adventures in Idaho

Adventure #3: World War 3

Battle 1: The battle of Red Robin
Opponent 1: Justis
Motive: Wish I knew
Opponent 2: Me
Motive: Preserve some sort of sanity, dignity, and not disturb all other restaurant goers. Also to avoid being asked to leave because of the disruptiveness of my son and not allowing my son to act improperly in a restaurant.

The battle: So on our trip, we celebrated Justis' birthday. We all went out to eat at Red Robin, one of my recent preferences because of how family friendly it is. Unfortunately, Justis was so tired that he was not in the proper restaurant attendance mind frame. He decided that he did not want to sit down but would rather walk along the entire long bench (to three or four tables down) and then refused to return to the table. When I tried to remove him from the situation, he brought out the big artillery. Screaming, flailing, crying, and impersonating a jelly fish (limp).

The climax of the battle: trying to remain calm and dignified while asking our waiter to send my dinner (and Justis') home with my family after they finished (we had just ordered), all without bursting into tears of frustration. (Mission accomplished)

The winner: It was a draw. Justis and I left (our great waiter was able to grab our food real quick so he caught us on our way out), leaving Nia with my sister and her family to enjoy my son's birthday dinner. Justis fell asleep within minutes of getting in the car.


Battle #2: The Gas Station Revolution
Opponent 1: Justis
Motive: Get what I want... What did I want?
Artillery: Shoes, Fruit Snacks, Other assorted snacks, fists, screaming, flailing, crying, and impersonating a jelly fish.

Opponent2: Me
Motive: Avoid having onlookers call the police due to what appeared like a potential kidnapping, avoid spanking, avoid giving child up for adoption to anyone who would take him.
Artillery: Strength and amazing ability to compartmentalize so as to avoid going into a complete meltdown.

The scene: Gas station/restroom stop/lunch stop in the middle of nowhere, Utah.

The battle: Trying to carry my screaming, flailing, and intermittently limp child into and out of the gas station because child number 1 (my saving grace) had to go potty. Justis did not want to go in, did not want to stay in the bathroom, did not want to go back out (doesn't that conflict with his desire not to go in?), did not want to get into the car, did not want to sit in his car seat, did not want to get buckled, did not...

I was seriously surprised that someone did not call the cops on me because everyone's faces looked like they thought I was kidnapping the child.

The climax: Getting back to the car, I tried to get him in. He no longer wanted to bet back in the car (this all started with him not wanting to get out of the car). When I tried to get him in the car, he fought me with everything he had. He tried to get out but I blocked the door. He took his shoes off and threw them out into the parking lot. When I went to get them, he hopped out and ran off (yes, in the middle of the parking lot). I finally got him and his shoes and got the door closed... AND LOCKED. He then proceeded to grab anything he could get his hands on (i.e. fruit snacks, crackers, boxes of crackers, etc) and throw it in the car, all the while screaming. When I moved the bin of food to the front seat, he tried to climb into the front seat to grab the food to throw. When I tried to have him to talk to dad and was about to hand him my iPhone, I could see the glimmer in his eyes and knew he would throw it to. Luckily it hadn't let go of it and so we battled over that as well (I won that).

The winner: Hard to say. There was severe loss on both sides.


Battle #3: The battle of the night
Opponent 1: Nia, Justis, Tori, and Abbie (the last two are my youngest sister's kids, ages 5 and 3 respectively)
Motivation: Stay awake as long as humanly possible
Opponent 2: Me
Motivation: Need some peace (to regain my sanity)

The scene: Two adjoining hotel rooms.

The battle: Trying to get two 5 year olds and two 3 year olds in pajamas, in bed, and asleep all at the same time.

The climax: Having to tell three of the four that were already put to bed to go back to bed about three or four times, while I was trying to hook up a portable DVD player so that sanity may be retained tomorrow (my mom's sanity) during Conference.

The winner: ME! Well, at least that makes one out of three. :) I did finally get them all asleep but I equate it to trying to get four cats to lay down and go to sleep in a specific spot and a specific position, all at the same time. This takes "herding cats" to a new level.


:)

7 comments:

Esther Ogden said...

This will take future Mother's Day gifts to a while new level for you-congratulations! =)

Angel Brockbank said...

I'm going to have to vote this one my favorite post of all time. Now, its not because you struggled so much, for that I truly do feel bad, but its just hilarious to read! I'm so glad to know that my kids are normal, and that at least one of yours is too! :) That was great Andi, very cute. Nicely formatted!

J. said...

I married you because you are a fighter. Little did I know your trip was going to be a "Battle Royale." I will enroll Justis in the UFC or WWE as soon as possible. Maybe we can make some coin out of this.

Melissa said...

:) it would be even funnier if this didn't all have rings of familiarity to it :)

Chelsea said...

You are a hero! I laughed the whole time reading this and totally sympathized. Ah, the joy of boys!

Jenn said...

You are so hilarious! My favorite line is "There was severe loss on both sides." That's just about every day at my house. :D

Shannon said...

I understand the feeling of "onlookers." Oh, to be able to truly discipline EVEN with people looking on. I can't tell you how many times a spanking has been warranted while shopping at Walmart! :)